What is He Doing?

 What is He Doing? That’s been the big question in my life recently. What is God doing? The things He is putting me through make no sense. Why would He tell me to move to Uganda now and then stop me three days before, telling me to go later? Does God lie to us? I know that the answer to that is no, but sometimes I just wonder. What’s He doing? During this struggle, I’ve felt distant from God. It’s like I’m angry with Him, yet I know I shouldn’t be. My mind and heart are in a constant battle. One knows the truth, while the other feels differently. 

So, what is God doing? Finally, an answer came to me yesterday. I had heard this answer before, but it never really sunk in until just hours ago. I don’t know what He’s doing, and the thing is, I don’t need to. I don’t need to know why God stopped me. All I need to do is continue on trying to serve Him. That’s it. I am not God. And what I mean by that is that I don’t need to know the things only God knows. He sees everything from a different perspective. For example, I’ve been to the ocean many times in my life, and one time in particular was very recent. I got to go to the beach and swim in some very turbulent waters (there was a lifeguard on duty though and I was never in any real danger). The waves were so enormous. As I stood neck deep in the ocean, wave after wave crashing over me, I would sometimes be completely covered and swept under the water by these huge waves. They were very powerful. And I couldn’t see over them. One would come. And that would be all I could see until it was passed. Then another would come. Of course, I was having a ton of fun swimming in the waves, but it was easy for me to see how limited my vision was. All I could see was the one wave. But when I would stand on the shore, gazing out over the ocean, I could see all of the waves at the same time. God can see all of the waves. But we, human beings, can only see the one in front of us. God sees the whole picture. We see just a part of it. So, we should trust Him. Wouldn’t you rather get directions for where to swim from the One who sees all of the waves compared to the person swimming right next to you?

 

Finally, I broke through all of my bitterness towards God just yesterday. My heart melted and I surrendered to Him anew. He loves me. He loves me so much. And I know that. He may have taken away what I thought was most important, for now at least. But that helped me remember that truly only God is most important. And God is my only hope. If he took everything from me, I would be fine. If He took my health, my future, my family, anything, I would still be ok. Why? Because God is all that I need to have joy. And the good news is, I ALREADY HAVE HIM! So I’m set for life, AND eternity!!!